Archive for April 27th, 2012

Wedding Invitation Etiquette – Monetary Gifts

Friday, April 27th, 2012

Money.  It’s what a lot of bride and grooms would prefer to receive for their bridal shower gifts or wedding gifts, but we all know it’s not proper to ask for that outright from your guests.  For many, the traditional registries for china, furniture and linens is essential as you build a home together for the first time.  However, for the modern day bride and groom, you may have been a couple for seven years or so prior to marriage, and living together for half of that time.  You may already have all of the pots, pans, linens and toasters you need!

We all know that your wedding ceremony/reception and bridal showers are meant to commemorate your nuptials, however it is likely that your guests will want to bring some sort of gift to you…though remember that it is presumptuous to assume that EVERYONE will bring a gift.  So, what does the modern couple do to inform their guests of their gift preferences without sounding greedy, tacky or well, rude?  The simple answer?  Word of mouth.

You should never (ever) put “Monetary gifts appreciated”, “Gift cards/checks only” or anything of that nature on your wedding invitations or bridal shower invitations.  I always cringe when I see this on invitations, and though most guests your age would be just fine with seeing that on an invitation, your Grandmother would just die.  Other guests may feel offended or feel obligated to send money, and then that may put pressure on them to give a gift that might not be in their budget.

We typically suggest spreading your request for monetary gifts by word of mouth by your bridesmaids and bridal party, parents of the bride and groom, etc.  You will still want to complete a small registry in case your guests are not comfortable sending money and would prefer to send gift off your registry.  You don’t have to register for the world, but I’m sure your linens or mugs could use a makeover.

Remember that when your guest gives a gift, whether physical or monetary, it is the sentiment behind it that matters.  We don’t get married so that we can receive gifts or have help paying for the wedding.  Whatever you receive for your special event, think how how special you should feel that you received a gift to commemorate the first day of your life together as husband and wife!